Recall Those Days, Look Back at All Those Times...

We've been struggling with getting Lydia to eat. She eats her snacks just fine - she loves lil crunchies, puffs, crackers, animal crackers, graham crackers, yogurt, etc. - and she loves breakfast - she eats pancakes and French toast sticks really well. But, she's not eating her lunch and dinner! She had started eating two jars of food for meals (one veggie and one fruit) so well, and then started wanted to eat whatever I was eating, so I decided to pay the $20 at the center for Lydia to eat what the other kiddos are eating. She has always been so interested in food, eats snacks all on her own just fine, I thought she'd do great!

However, she has started throwing tantrums during meals. She will take a bite or two of the food, then start to scream and turn her head away from the spoon! I would then offer a jarred food, and she would do the same thing! It wasn't until she got some puffs or crackers in front of her that she would eat something. This stressed me out because I was worried she wasn't getting enough to eat. Since she has stopped nursing and only drinks about 10oz of formula a day, I was worried about her weight gain. This is why I would give her snacks if she didn't eat the food - so she at least had something to eat! But, this was my downfall. Lydia definitely has a personality, and at only 10 months, seems to know what she wants and how to get it. She knew I would give her a snack after meals, so she decided she only wanted the snack!

Well, this week I have started being stricter with her about what she eats. I make sure she gets something she likes for breakfast, but for 9:00 snack, she only gets the same amount the other girls get. I would usually just keep giving her food until she was done, but it's just a snack! Now, I don't give in to her screaming during lunch time. She gets the food that is offered. I will give her a jarred fruit or applesauce if she's not eating the table food right away. Also, I had Brian get her early from the center on Monday and had him give her dinner (mac n' cheese and applesauce). She ate perfectly for him - no tantrums! Leah says Lydia knows she can get away with a lot with me...smart girl.

Yesterday and today she did great at lunch! She had beans and dogs yesterday and ate them all down! She even fed herself a little bit. Then for dinner she had mac 'n cheese with jarred squash mixed in and some jarred fruit. She ate it all! Today she had a quarter of a grilled ham and cheese sandwich and applesauce - yummy! She didn't want to eat her dinner of mac 'n cheese tonight - but she wasn't in a very good mood this evening. I make sure to praise her when she started eating the food and tell her how yummy it is. I think this is helping her because it always makes her happy when she's praised. 

I need to keep track of the meals that she likes, so I can remember them for the weekends and dinner. So far she has eaten:

• mac 'n cheese
• beans and dogs
• grilled ham and cheese sandwich
• cheese pasta with broccoli
• peach and pineapple
• hot dogs

I don't mind if she wants to eat hot dogs and mac n' cheese for lunch, but I want her to start eating what we eat at dinner. She is able to join us for the weekend dinners, since I can have dinner ready by 6:00 on the weekend. This weekend I will encourage her to eat what we're eating. Brian wants her to be like him - eating all kinds of veggies and fruits and foods. Hopefully she's not picky like me!

He Was Bound to Love You When He Heard You Sing

There was a post on my babycenter.com Birth Board about items we bought/received that we never used for the baby. I think I have three categories for this: (1) Things I wanted but didn't need, (2) things I needed but didn't ask for (or know I needed), and (3) things I wanted and needed.

(1) Things I Wanted But Didn't Need:

• Boppy: I thought this would be handy when I was nursing, but it was actually more cumbersome than helpful. And, since Lydia didn't drink a bottle, I never propped her in it. She rarely used it for tummy time or laying in, since I couldn't leave her on the floor or the kiddos would get to her. Maybe if I hadn't been working with other children, I may have used it more. I used her Newborn Lounger way more!
• Shopping Cart Cover: Luckily I didn't spend my money on this, but was I was given one by a friend. Brian and I tried it once and realized that it took way too much time to put on than it was worth, since Lydia usually doesn't last the whole shopping trip in the cart, anyway! And, I'm not a germaphobe, so just sitting her in the cart doesn't bother me.
• Travel System: I really wanted a Travel System, but am glad that my sister gave me one of those strollers that's just the car seat and the base of the stroller. They are so much easier to move around and put in the back of your car! Using an umbrella stroller is a lot easier than the huge Travel System strollers.
• Swing: I asked for one of those "travel" swings, since they're smaller and would fit in my house. Lydia, however, did not enjoy this swing. I also got the one that didn't sit up, just laid down. Lydia likes the big swings in the Church Nursery that sit up. Should have gotten her one of those.
• Swaddlers: I knew the benefits of having your baby swaddled at night and all the special swaddlers they have now a days. But, I'm glad I only purchased one, because Lydia didn't like the swaddlers at night. She liked being swaddled in a receiving blanket during the day, but not in a swaddler at night. She wore the pajama sacks, but nothing that restrained her arms or legs.

(2) Things I Needed But Didn't Ask For (Or Knew I Needed):

• Glider: I didn't think I wanted one - I would just sit on my bed to nurse her or on a couch or chair. But, my in-laws surprised us with one when we got back from the hospital. Now I have no idea what I would do without a glider! I love it! When Lydia was tiny, I would get out of bed and nurse her, then would have to rock her for awhile before she would go back to sleep. Sometimes I would fall asleep in the glider. And, though I know you're not supposed to rock your child to sleep, I still use it to put Lydia to sleep!
• Burp Cloths: I didn't think I would need these, either. I didn't ask for any. My co-workers gave me a few that were super cute and I loved using. And my friend gave me the cloth diapers that make good burp cloths. Lydia spit up quite a bit when she was teensy, so they came in handy! If I had known how I would have liked them, I would have gotten more.
• Pajamas: Now, don't get me wrong, I knew Lydia needed pajamas, I just didn't realize how many! When they're tiny, they wet through PJs all the time! Luckily, my friend gave me her daughter's pajamas, so Lydia had a lot. But, she's outgrowing them and I need to get her more. 
• White Onesies: These came in very handy, but I never thought about them until much later! I should have asked for them and collected a lot! They're great during the winter and to wear under t-shirts!
• Bumpers: I was freaked out about bumpers, because of SIDS or suffocation. But, Lydia has recently started sticking her arms through the bars when sleeping and I was worried that she would get her arm stuck and wake up. So, we went out to get her the "breathable" bumpers and they're working great!

(3) Things I Wanted and Needed:

• Play Gym: Lydia loved her little floor play gym! They're expensive, but she would lay underneath for an hour or so and play and play! We still have it set up and she will play in it every once in awhile.
• Newborn Lounger: The first time I saw it was when I was registering for baby stuff. I loved it! And so did Lydia! She would nap in it (I know, she's not technically supposed to) and just relax in it. Now it's a great pillow that will come in handy when she's older.
• Changing Table/Changing Pad: Technically, I never got a changing table, but what I do have has come in handy. I am using my old desk as a table, with a big changing pad on top. I love that it has drawers to store everything in, and space underneath to put stuff, as well. It's much easier changing Lydia on top of the table versus on the floor.
• Angel Heartbeat Monitor: I know it was expensive, but I asked for it anyway. Thankfully one of my friends gave me this and I love it! I don't know how I would have slept without it! Lydia slept in a bassinet next to our bed for the first 3 months with the heartbeat monitor underneath the small mattress pad. I could barely sleep worrying about my baby, so this definitely helped. If it detected no movement (or heartbeat) for 30 seconds, an alarm would go off. The only drawback is that you have to remember to turn off the monitor when you pick the baby up! If Lydia wasn't such a mover, the monitor would be underneath her crib mattress...but she moves everywhere and the alarm would go off all the time. I know some people complained about false alarms...I never had one...but a false alarm is better than it not going off when you need it to!

Watching The Wiggles

I'm Here, With You, Beside You....

This month's title movie theme is PHANTOM OF THE OPERA! It was my very first Broadway musical, and it is currently the movie I am exercising to. I was able to run 10 straight minutes today - very proud of myself. I just told myself I could run til the end of the song ("Phantom of the Opera/Music of the Night"). I can't believe that movie came out in 2004! So long ago! I also forgot how horrible an actress Emmy Rossum is, but I love Gerard Butler!

I received Lorie Line's new music book in the mail on Monday! So excited!! This book is all her arrangements of modern songs...except "Feed the Birds", but it's still on Broadway, so it counts. I wish I could play Pop music on the piano, but even with Lorie's arrangements, I still don't feel comfortable playing Pop songs. She has "Love Story" by Taylor Swift and "I've Got a Feeling" by the Black Eyed Peas. I can play them decently, but they don't sound good to my ear. I was immediately able to play "Feed the Birds" (love the arrangement - simple and beautiful), and I'm good at "I Can See the Light" (from TANGLED), and "The King's Speech (from THE KING'S SPEECH). I'm working on "Leaning On the Everlasting Arms" (a song made popular today from TRUE GRIT), and will most likely work on "As Long as I Have You" (from WICKED....but that's not my favorite song).

I was finally able to really play the piano this afternoon. I was able to get off work at 5:00 and Brian surprised Lydia and me by getting home early. After Lydia ate dinner, Brian took her on an adventure (to look at grills) so I could play the piano! Love him! I try to get Lydia to sit and play while I'm on the piano, but in the evenings she's not in a good mood so won't sit for very long. And it's very hard to concentrate on a new song when your baby is crying. I love that Brian took it upon himself to take her out of the house so I could practice my music. I love playing the piano and wish I could do it more often. But, I also love playing with my baby. When she's older she'll let me play more...and then she can start playing! I can't wait to play duets with her!

I finished Jasper Fforde's new Thursday Next book and have restarted the series. I'm still on Book #1 (or TN-1) and am in love with it all over again! I totally forgot some things that happened (despite reading it twice a long time ago) and can't wait to finish it and move onto the next book! I'm reading one of Leah's books at her house (can't remember the name) - simple Chic Lit, which is a nice break when I'm over there. Fforde's books usually require lots of thinking and remembering facts about literature, but Leah's Chic Lit books are easy to read (and sometimes skim), are funny, and fun to read.

Lydia has started crawling on her hands and knees now! She started all of a sudden this past weekend while we were in Austin! She's learning to crawl and walk at the same time, silly girl. She will usually take a few steps every day, and will sometimes start walking on her own (I just have to make sure I'm paying attention and will catch her). She has gotten the other kiddos to start wanting to crawl around, since we praise her when she starts crawling. Lydia spent most of the day with Grandma and Katie, and Cousin Abram. She went to BSF and then Chick-fil-a for lunch. My mom then took her to the park and they went on a walk. Lydia had a blast! She always cries when Grandma comes to pick her up, but always has a blast!

This past weekend I left Lydia at my in-laws' church nursery. She was the only baby there at 8:30am. She cried for 20 minutes before falling asleep! It made me want to cry when I said bye to her and then again when I found out she had been crying for so long! My precious baby. We're leaving her in the 9-12 month nursery this weekend, so we'll see how she does. Hopefully she won't cry the whole time. Although it would be kind of fun to be paged while in church - to see her name on the screens! Lydia needs to work on her stranger anxiety and I need to work on leaving her with other people.

Are You Certain What You Wish is What You Want?

I just wanted to blog about my day yesterday...and about Lydia, of course.

Yesterday (Saturday), Brian and I both had to wake up at 6:00 with Lydia. Brian had to drive to school to tutor his students. He left around 7:15ish and got back around 11:00. Which left me alone with Lydia in the morning. We both got up early so we could take a shower while one watched Lydia. Usually on Saturdays and Sundays, one of us will get up with Lydia while the other one sleeps in. 

After getting ready, Lydia and I headed off to McDonald's for breakfast. She loves pancakes! She always signs "more" even before she's done with what is in her mouth. She almost ate a whole pancake. She also sampled a hash brown and sipped at apple juice. When we finished, it was almost 8:30, so we didn't have time to go to HEB as planned, but would get to The Little Gym early. Once I made it to Bandera, Lydia was sleeping, so I just kept driving for about 15 minutes and made it to The Little Gym at 8:55.

Lydia loves Gym class! She is now wanting to walk around and explore everything. She looks for my hands, grabs them, and then starts walking, expecting you to follow. She loves the circle time activity (we sang and then walked in a circle) and watching all the other babies. Then we get to explore the Gym on our own. Lydia loves this! She grabbed my hands and headed off. She held onto the low metal bars and started dancing to the music and smiling at the babies. She has a great grip on the high bars. She loves the "cheese" and crawling around on it. She loves just walking around and looking at everything and everyone. She didn't like the "skill of the week", which was to hold onto the high bar and almost flip over. Miss Jenny tried helping her and she got a bit upset - although she smiled at Miss Jenny on our way over. Two weeks ago, she let Miss Jenny help her with a back flip and smiled! We then sat in a circle again and tossed balls around, blew bubbles (Lydia loves bubbles), and sang songs. The Little Gym (though expensive) is so much fun!

I'm hoping Lydia will get over her stranger anxiety with this Gym fun. She's seeing people and babies that she doesn't normally see, and every once in awhile will have to interact with Miss Jenny, the teacher. I hope when she starts walking she'll be willing to explore on her own and not be afraid of the other parents or Miss Jenny. I'm also hoping to meet some new parents, although I'm horrible at starting up conversations and mingling with other people! Blast my shyness!

After The Little Gym, we headed to HEB to get Lydia formula and baby food. She has recently started eating more table food. I gave her some chicken and potatoes the other day and she loved it! But, the baby food is a back up to if she doesn't like the table food or we can't give it to her. After HEB, we came home, I gave her a 4oz bottle, and she fell asleep. She then slept for 3 hours! She was worn out! Brian came home right after I put her down. I then took a 2 hour nap and Brian played his video game. We thought we'd go out to lunch, but when Lydia didn't wake up until 2:00, we decided just to eat at home.

When Lydia finally woke up, we headed off to run our errands. Jasper Fforde's new book, One of Our Thursdays is Missing recently came out so I just had to buy it! I LOVE his books! I am very disappointed in myself for not noticing that he came to Austin a few weeks ago to sign his new book! I saw him 3 years ago and really enjoyed it! As I told Brian last night, I am so glad that I am well-read (thank you AP English), so I get all of Fforde's literature jokes. For example, the "written" Thursday has characters from Crime and Punishment come visit. They can't remember each other's names, who they are, what character does what, etc. I remember when we started reading this book in AP English and my teacher said to keep a list of all the characters handy - with all the variations to their names. Russians go by so many different names! Luckily I listened, or I would have been as lost as the characters in Fforde's book! I love his books mainly because they're about books. Thursday Next can go into books and talk to the characters. In the first book of the series, The Eyre Affair, Edward Rochester jumps out of the book to rescue Thursday, and then she goes into the book to help bring Edward and Jane together at the end! LOVE IT!

Anyway, we also went to Target to get Katie a birthday present and look at above ground pools for our backyard. Then we were off to BabiesRUs to buy a bumper for Lydia's crib - I should have bought one a long time ago. She keeps sticking her arms out of the crib when she sleeps and I'm worried her arms will get stuck! We got the breathable kind, since the reason I didn't get one before is because they don't recommend them for babies (they could suffocate). Then to Michael's. We bought the paper you can print pictures on and iron on to t-shirts for Lydia's birthday outfit.

Then to Katie's birthday! We had a great time and met a lot of new people. Katie had a cook out at my parent's house (both my parents are out of town - don't worry, she got permission). We had hotdogs, hamburgers, and played lots of games! Lydia stayed up until 8:00 - she was in a great mood! I put her to bed upstairs, but she woke up an hour later when the puppies started fighting. She stayed up until we left at 10:00, and then went right to bed when we got home. She woke up at 1:30, but then slept until 6:00. Brian got up with her and she was ready for a nap by 7:30. He came back to bed and she napped until 8:30.

Now we'll be heading to church to help in the nursery, since it's our week and my parent's are gone. This is Lydia's last week in the Bluebonnet Nursery. She'll be moving downstairs to the 9-12 month room next week! I kept her longer upstairs, since my parents work there. I'm not ready for Lydia to grow up...or for this weekend to be over!

Near May Be Better Than Far, But it Still Isn't There

I am so excited! Lydia took two steps today - on her own! She's very good at standing unassisted (she can't get up on her own, she has to pull up or be pulled up). Today she was even standing, wobbled a bit, and steadied herself! I had her standing in front of me and she took a step toward me! Then, I moved her back a bit farther and she took two steps toward me! After that, she thought it was more fun to just stand and then fall forward toward me. But, we will definitely work on this and I am so excited!

We made the coolest cupcakes today! They're called Rainbow Cupcakes! I had them as one of our February activities, since rainbows = leprechauns = St. Patrick's Day. We'll be making "pots of gold" with yellow jell-o next week.

Anyway, to make Rainbow Cupcakes, you just buy a box of white/vanilla cupcake mix (or make your own from scratch, I guess). After you follow the directions on the box, separate the cupcake mix into four (or however many you want; it depends on how many colors you want) containers. Then, add a different color food dye to each container. We just used pink, blue, orange (we mixed yellow and pink/red), and green. Of course, you can get more creative and make lots of different colors by mixing them. Then, one by one, put the different colored cupcake mixes into the cupcake pan. Put the mix into the oven, bake, and ta-da - a rainbow in a cupcake pan!

We had the kiddos pour the ingredients and then stir. Toddlers love to bake! The other week we made home-made playdough (very fun!) and banana bread. Now that the kiddos are between 17 and 22 months, they can do and understand so much! We just have to constantly say, "Don't touch it, yet"...or they'll put their hands into everything! I only had one kiddo who immediately reached out and touched the cupcake mix, but only after a few reminders, he left it alone. It's always important to explain exactly what we're doing as we do a cooking activity. Saying, "Okay, now it's A's turns to stir, then it will be B's turn." Or, "Now it's time to pour in the water, who wants to carefully pour the water?" I give each ingredient a name, instead of just handing each item to the child. I also try to get the kiddos involved as much as possible. I always let them stir everything together, but I usually end up making sure it's thoroughly stirred after they each have a turn.

Cooking introduces sensory (touch of the batter, the spoon, the color of the mixture, what an egg feels like), fine motor (pouring in the ingredients, stirring the batter), and science (what happens when you crack open an egg or stir in food coloring?). Also, the end product tastes yummy, and the kiddos are very pleased with themselves when they get to taste what they made! Cooking is a fun, easy project to do with your child, at any age!

Giants Never Strike the Same House Twice

Spring Break is pretty much over - just Saturday and Sunday left. Of course, it wasn't a real Spring Break for me...I worked full time this week. The kiddos' parents didn't get Spring Break (supposedly...we figured out that a few didn't work), so we didn't get one either. Luckily, we only had all 5 kiddos on Monday. Tuesday we had 4, all but one was gone by 4:30...the one stayed until after 6. Wednesday we were supposed to have 4, but ended up with 3, so Leah took the afternoon off. Thursday we only had 3, so I took part of the day off (I worked about 1.5 hours in the morning, and 2 in the afternoon. Today, we thought we'd end up with all 5, but managed to only have 4...although all were gone by 4:30, except one...who stayed until after 6.

Brian and Lydia were able to enjoy their Spring Break! I was very happy to see how much Lydia enjoyed being with her Daddy. Brian and Lydia don't have much time to spend one-on-one. On the weekends, we like to do things all together, as a family. It was nice that Brian got to have a chance to take care of Lydia, making sure she had everything she needed. Being the controlling, crazy mother that I am, I wrote out directions for Brian the first two days. I wrote out the times that she needed to eat, and the exact foods she needed to eat. I also wrote out to change her diaper and not to give her milk or strawberries! The first day, Brian didn't follow the instructions. I knew Lydia was fine, but I'm always worried that she doesn't get enough to eat or drink. The second day, Brian followed all the instructions! And by the third day, he didn't need written instructions anymore! I asked Brian if he enjoyed watching Lydia and he said "Yes" with a big smile on his face. He loves being the person Lydia wants and being in charge of her needs. Of course, he had lots of help from my family, but he did a great job on his own!

Spring Break Day 1 - Cave Without a Name

The group - my parents, little brother, cousin, nephew, grandfather, husband and baby - left around 9:00 to head off to Boerne and go spelunking in the Cave Without a Name. We bought Lydia a backpack for Brian to carry her in. She loves it! And, Brian loved it too. It was much easier carrying her around on his back than just carrying her. She was also able to nap in the backpack!

The cave explorers had a lot of fun walking around the cave. They then went to Uncle Bernies ice cream place to enjoy ice cream and relax after their exploring. They came back home around 5:00ish. Lydia had a great time!

Spring Break Day 2 - Enchanted Rock

The main reason we purchased the backpack for Lydia was for hiking up Enchanted Rock. Just about every summer we visited Texas, my family always went up Enchanted Rock. My mom can remember my dad and her carrying Leah and me up Enchanted Rock in backpacks! Enchanted Rock was the place to be on Tuesday of Spring Break! Everyone waited in line for 2 hours in order to get into the park! They had a 2 hour delayed start, but still ate lunch and then hiked up Enchanted Rock.

I was worried about the hot weather, the sun, and needing water for Lydia. But, after telling Brian over and over to give her water and put sunscreen on her, she had a great time. Brian said Lydia preferred to drink out of his Nalgene than to drink from her sippy cup! She even wore her hat the whole time! They hiked all the way up to the top, stayed for a few hours, and then hiked over to the Rooster's Rock (or whatever it's called). They were definitely gone much longer than I had thought.

I got off work at 6:00, ran, took a shower, ate dinner, watched WAR AND PEACE (with Audrey Hepburn - didn't finish it), and then finally my baby and my husband came home! At 9:00!! Lydia is always in bed by 6:00! Luckily, even though she slept all the way from Fredericksburg, she was able to go right to sleep and slept most of the night. Of course, despite going to bed 3 hours later than usual (and hiking), she still woke up at 6:00 in the morning!

Spring Break Day 3 - Downtown

Day 3 didn't start until after 2:00. My parents volunteered at BSF Headquarters, ran a few errands, and then were ready to head downtown to the Pearl Brewery for a tour. I let Leah get off work at 11:30 to get ready to head out. She also went to get her haircut at La Cantera. I only had 3 kiddos until 2:30, then I only had 2. It was an easy day.

Lydia headed off with Aunt Leah, Uncle Jessie and my parents around 3:00. They toured the Pearl Brewery, then walked all the way to Schilo's to drink Root Beer and eat sausage, then walked all the way back! Leah said it was a lot of walking!

I got off work at 5:30, ran, took a shower, went to Walgreens to pick up photos, then waited for the family to get back. We had dinner of Schlotzkys and Whataburger on our back porch. Lydia went to bed at almost 8:00 that night!

Spring Break Day 4 - Aquarena Springs

Finally I got to join in on some Spring Break fun! I went to work from 6:45 to about 8:45. Leah came out around 8:00, but I had to wait until my parents came to pick us up. Brian hung out with us while we waited. Leah ended up only have 2 kiddos that day!

We headed out at 8:45 for San Marcos! Brian and I were able to think back about our times at Texas State. We enjoyed pointing things out to people, and marveled at the changes! We went to the Phoenix Rising bakery to pick up some yummy bread, then to the Wood Castle Park (that's what I call it) to play and eat. We were also waiting for the clouds to go away - they didn't.

We then headed off to Aquarena Springs to go on the glass bottom boats! Unfortunately, mom and dad's Groupons didn't work over Spring Break, but they still gave them a deal. We were able to look at the aquarium while we waited, then got to enjoy to the boat ride. Brian and I have been on the boats several times, but it was Lydia's first time (and Katie's and Chris'). Lydia was very busy the whole ride. She wanted to look down at the water, then out the window, then play with Katie's coffee mug, then play with grandma's camera, then back at the water.... She's a very busy girl! We weren't able to walk up behind the springs, because it was closed, but we walked the marsh area and had a good time.

We went to KFC for lunch, and brought it to the San Marcos river to have a picnic - yummy! The sun, of course, finally came out! We then went to Tanger Outlets and braved the crowds to go shopping. I, of course, went to the Carter's store and bought Lydia an Easter dress and a cute day outfit. I could have shopped in that store a long time! We headed home at 2:30.

I got back to work before 4:00 and stayed until 6:00, when our last kiddo left. Lydia finally went to bed on time!

Spring Break Day 5 - Magnolia House and Putt-Putt

Brian was able to get some chores done this morning before heading off to brunch at the Magnolia House. They had to wait an hour to get in, but managed to eat some yummy pancakes! Lydia has recently started eating pancakes and loves them..although more usually ends up on the floor.than in her tummy.

After brunch, the group went Putt-Putting! Brian said that Lydia loved watching everyone and held onto the club! Even though he didn't win, Brian had a good time. They were back by 3:30 and Lydia was in a great mood. AND, guess what?! Today Lydia's right top tooth has finally broken through!! Very exciting!

Daddy took Lydia home at 5:45 to give her a bath and put her in bed. I got off work at 6:00 and was able to run before dinner and catching up on our TV shows (Community, Glee and Bones!).

Tomorrow Leah, mom and I head off to Austin to go to Jodi Picoult's book signing. Leah is a huge fan. I have read MY SISTER'S KEEPER (the movie is definitely not as good as the book!) and the one about the girl with brittle bone disease. Jodi Picoult isn't my favorite author, but I love hearing authors talk about their books! A few years ago, I got to see Jasper Fforde speak and it was awesome!

Brian and my dad are watching Lydia while I'm gone. We also get to pick up Lydia's "old fashioned" photos tomorrow - very excited!

Opportunity Is Not a Lengthy Visitor

As a first time mom, I love getting advice from just about everyone. My sister, Leah, had worked with infants for about 5 years by the time Lydia was born. She was chock full of information on how to feed, diaper, and make a schedule for your infant. My mom, a mother of 6 kids, knew a lot about babies, as well. Although, she claims, she forgot how "tough" they are...she only remembers the good parts. I read up about babies in What To Expect books, I bought Suppernanny's baby how-to book, I am constantly on babycenter.com reading how other moms are dealing with their babies.  So, despite being a first time mom, I was, I thought, a prepared first time mom. I had tons of support from my family on how to deal with anything from crying, nursing, diapering, the proper way to hold a baby - everything. Leah had her opinions on how to handle a fussy baby, while my mom had hers. 

It's been a little over 9 months since Lydia was born. Despite my ability to allow Lydia to suck on a pacifier that fell on the floor (without cleaning it first) and allowing her to try all types of table foods (from pancakes to French Fries), I still find myself a "paranoid", "controlling" first time mom. When I send Lydia off to BSF, I pack a list of instructions for her teachers and my mom on when to feed her, how much, and any other specific directions I have. When I leave her with my mom for a few hours, I always give detailed instructions on what Lydia needs and when she needs it, and how to go about giving it to her. I stress about her getting enough food now that she's refusing to nurse and refuses most formula bottles. I get upset when she gets hurt. I still immediately pick her up if she starts fussing. When Lydia's not with me, I stress about how she's doing and if she's behaving. And recently, I'm stressing about her diaper rash (something she never had when she was younger).

I'm proud of myself, as a first time mom, for not stressing too much about the little things - such as, I buy used clothes, use hand-me-downs, buy used toys and strollers, etc. I let Lydia eat Sherbet, French Fries, Cinnamon graham crackers, etc. But, at the same time, I'm still your typical first time mom. The other day, Lydia was being fussy and making me frustrated. Leah took her from me, which caused Lydia to scream. I tried taking her from Leah, but Leah said "She's okay"....and, of course, eventually got Lydia settled down. Hearing her fuss and cry still makes me upset. I can't go to sleep without checking on Lydia several times first. I constantly turn the monitor up a little louder, so I can hear Lydia. I pull the car over to get Lydia her pacifier when she starts screaming in the car and we're by ourselves.

I love mommy-hood. I just wonder if I'll be this paranoid and stressed over my next child, or children. Will I always be worried about my "babies", does that ever go away? How will I react when Lydia goes to Kindergarten? When she starts driving?! Mommy-hood has it's wonderful benefits, but also it's downside - stress and worry!

If The End is Right, It Justifies the Beans!

It has almost been one month since Lydia last nursed. It's been one day since Lydia last had her taste of breast milk. Part of me is relieved - I feel free. I have my body back to myself, Lydia is independent of me (partly), she can eat jarred food and snacks to sustain her (mostly). But part of me is sad - my baby no longer "needs" me. I so enjoyed nursing Lydia and am glad I lasted so long - many women don't. I wanted to be able to pump enough for her, but then I'd be pumping all the time. I rarely got more than 4oz at a time, when I only pumped 4 or 5 hours apart. When I pumped only 1 or 2 hours apart, I got only 1 or 2oz. 

I slowly weaned Lydia off the breast milk, just as I slowly weaned my body to produce no more milk. I added more and more formula and less and less breast milk to her bottles. I went from pumping 4 times a day, to 3, to 2, to 1. This morning I didn't pump - and I survived! She drinks about three bottles a day - at 7:00, 12:30, and 6:00. Today she didn't want her morning bottle, and only drank 1oz of her afternoon bottle. She drank about 3oz of her night time bottle, and I will give the rest to her in a "dream feed".

It's been a little over a week since I started the Special K diet. I had to "modify" the diet, though. I couldn't stand starving myself during the day. Lydia wasn't nursing so I was stressed, the kiddos are stressful, my life is buy and I was HUNGRY! I have the Special K cereal in the morning, a Special K snack at 9:00, a somewhat light lunch at 11:00, a Special K snack at 2:00, an apple at 4:00, and dinner at 6:30 or 7:00. I don't snack in between like I used to, I don't have ice cream or chocolate like I used to. I have already lost a little over 2 pounds! I run/walk for 20 minutes still. I need to try to go a bit longer, but I'm usually hungry since it's so late at night. But, that's the only time I have to exercise - after Lydia's in bed.

Lydia fell and got her first bloody nose this morning. She can stand up on her own from sitting in the little blue chair - she thinks she's so funny and big! She was standing and I was rather far away, but clapped my hands and told her "good job!" She got so excited, she wanted to come to me. I started walking toward her, but she went forward before I could get to her. She hit her face on the floor. I hurried to her and picked her up. She was quite upset. At first, I didn't notice the bloody nose, until I saw it on my shirt. I tried to clean it up on my own (without Leah's help - she was in the bathroom with one of the kiddos, potty training). I saw the blood and my upset baby and knew I needed Leah's help. I hurried her to the bathroom and told Leah what happened. Leah immediately took the paper towel from me, tipped Lydia's head back a bit and held the tower to her nose. Lydia screamed and screamed while I held her. We got the blood to stop flowing and I calmed Lydia down. I was very thankful to have Leah around. I have a hard time dealing with my baby getting hurt - it makes me upset, as well.